Hi all Smiler My name is Janet and I'm from Salem, Oregon. On August 29th I lost my 86 year old mother to carcinoma of the tongue. Some of you may say she lived a long life (as she said right after she got the diagnosis) but her life could have been longer...how much? Who knows. But I won't get into that here. It took her very quickly after diagnosis....she was diagnosed August 3rd and August 29th she left us. I miss her so terribly much and just don't feel it's fair. She told the doctors for months of her pain but yet they basically told her it was in her head, take an aspirin......never looked, never felt, never did any scans of any kind, no blood work....nothing. Until a really nice oncologist believed her and looked, and felt and was horrified and admitted her to the hospital on the spot. I'll never forget when the doctor came in, looked mom in the eye and said "Doris this is bad, very bad....you have cancer and are going to die. We have 3 choices, we can cut out your tongue and voice box and you'll never swallow or speak again and you're going to die, or we can give you radiation and chemo and it will kill you quicker and do no good, you're going to die, or we can let the cancer runs it's course and do nothing, you're going to die. Which one do you want?" And mom looked at her with her little button eyes and held up 3 fingers and burst into tears which made everyone in the room, even the male nurses cry with her. Worse day of my life. But we got her into a care facility and my brother and I spent a week with her....just being with her, letting her know we cared. We live 10 hours from where she was and had to go home with the promise we'd be back. A week later we were told we had to move her, SS would no longer pay for her care. We found a very very nice hospice house and had her moved there. The day, the very day we were getting ready to get in the car and go back to her, the hospice home called...mom was slipping. My brother was on one line with them and I on another when they informed us that she had passed away as we were speaking. I just want to send prayers and hope and strength out to all of you who are fighting or have a loved one who is fighting this cruel cancer. Sorry if I sounded like a cry baby, but we don't really have any local support groups around here. Thanks and god bless you all.
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