I already have anti-depressants. I already knew deep down that this was tumor of some sort. How did I get this? I have never smoked, don't drink and drugs has ever been an option. I live a clean good life. This isn't fair in any sense of the word. I have been a Christian forever and am married to a minister. People treat me like I have done something major wrong for something like this to creep up on me. What did I do? I have major questions that are more important than that one though. Chemo is the number one cause of death in patients - I know - my sister and my mother both died from strokes caused from the chemo. Is there another option should I have to go that route?